It's okay. We all find ourselves janked up at some point and have to find ourselves in the loving care of the folks at Rampart. Maybe you did too much of one thing and not enough of another? Time to comemorate the event with a patch?
If you would like to buy one of all of them, why not buy the De/Merit Badge Pre Order Bundle? The bundle gives you 8 for the price of 7! What a steal.
Each one is lovingly crafted by robots, manhandled by a Canadian . The final size may change, but current specs set this badge at 2" wide with a smoothly embroidered edge (aka Merrowed).